Saturday, February 13, 2010

Entropy and I have reached a treaty

The house is quiet; two tall, young redheads are in a distant room playing their respective computers, one tall, baldy is lankily sprawled on the bed reading his latest photography magazine.
Entropy seems not to be winning, at least as long as one's eyes are closed. A quick look around this place tells anyone who's asking that yes, indeed, all system do tend to disorder--and quickly.
It's all I can do to keep my head above water: dust and cat hair and mail in various stages of disarray closing in on every side.
I sigh and put up blinders: my night stand is tidy; my clothes are arranged in an orderly fashion; my kitchen is....well...ahem...mostly clean. But the point is, I focus on the spaces that are mine. My mantra of, "I only control myself," hums along so quietly in the background of all my other thoughts that I don't even notice it anymore--except in moments of panic, and then it's there, calm and reassuring.

Today I skied.
I wish I didn't lose my confidence so easily, resorting to the stupid ole snowplow.
The weird thing is, I din't even DO the snowplow the first day I ever skied. My sister-in-law taught me, and she just showed me how to ski. It was only later, after losing control and going waaaaay too fast that I adopted the snowplow. Oh well. I still have fun, and that's really all that counts, right? Exercise and having fun.

I'm taking College Algebra from the University of Maine, Fort Kent (online) this semester. I'm decent with math, but it's not what I would call my "strong suit." I did well in high school, but then in college I decided it would be a good idea to neglect to hand in any of my homework, so I failed the class. When I retook College Algebra, it was the last straw--I was ready to drop out already, and was focused way more on my full-time job, and I again failed to complete my assignments, this time for a D-. Ha! Well, now I'm at it again, and guess what? I have completed EVERY assignment, quiz, and exam and so far have a 96%...because, come on--it's still me, I'm still going to rush through things without checking my work! It's super easy so far, but I'm not going to get cocky. Still, I can't believe I didn't do my homework before. What was I thinking??